persiflage

April 5, 2007

I would like to hang myself on the nearest branch of the cherry trees standing now in full bloom. This wonderful spring with its secret life and movement troubles me unspeakably.
                                         - Hugo Wolf

PERSIFLAGE is updated Thursdays.

Classifieds

Having a party? Contact Teddy Barnstar, Party Guy. Teddy will come to your party and for a small fee he will be mildly amusing and feign interest in what you have to say. For a slightly larger fee he will be downright amusing and appear quite interested in your better stories. For an enormous fee he will be wildly entertaining and completely fascinated by absolutely everything that comes out of your mouth (include bits of food). Contact Box 44 for rates.
Spanish Peanut Lessons. Learn how to remove the little husk bits from your teeth afterwards and other appropriate skills. Box 1492.
Professor William Wanamaker would like students in his Tales of the Diaspora Spring Session Course at the University of Winnipeg to know that classes will now be held in 1C07, 2M34, 3L14 and 2A13.

Tips for Spring Living:

Tip #2:  Exercise caution when frolicking or gamboling. Your muscles need to be sufficiently warm to accomplish either activity. Start out with a mild trot.

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PERSIFLAGE General Knowledge Quiz

This week a little test of just how much you know. There are no prizes except for the knowledge that you are nowhere near as well-informed as you thought you were.

    1  What is the Capital of Wyoming?

    2  Why?

    3  Have you ever been to Wyoming?

    4  Why?

    5  Are you sick of questions about Wyoming?

    6  How about now?

    7  If you were to take a brown egg and bury it in a shoe under a porch what would it smell like?

    8  The Doges of Venice wore a very distinctive hat. Popes have traditionally worn a distinctive hat. What other famous Italian offices entail the wearing of distinctive hats?

    9  Why do you care?

    10  In 1066 somebody (I mean somebody famous smart guy) got an arrow in the eye. Any idea who that was?

    11  Look up fantastico in the dictionary and then write the definition on a small piece of paper. Fold that paper into a really, really small wad and place it under the wobbly leg of that table on the porch. Now, isn't that better?

    12  Why do you think you deserve happiness?