kind of bluish  

August 6th, 2009

But any one that is much in Company will observe, That the Height of good Breeding is shown rather in never giving Offence, than in doing obliging Things. Thus, he that never shocks you, though he is seldom entertaining, is more likely to keep your Favour, than he who often entertains, and sometimes displeases you.

Sir Richard Steele


For sale: DVDs of the Greatest Sports/Astrology Movie Ever Made - Now available: The Director's Cut of The Fish That Saved Pittsburgh, starring Stockard Channing and Dr. Julius Irving. Box 1979.
For rent: garden party kits. Includes patio lanterns, paper table cloths and life sized cutouts of Ricky Nelson and Kim Mitchell. Box 23.
Married Beige gentleman with love of processed cheese and harmonizing mice (that is mice that harmonize I have neither the skill nor temperament to make mice harmonize) seeks open-minded gal with love of tiny farm implements. Object: extremely brief affair. Box 11.
Wanted: photograph of Susan Sontag wearing a summer hat. Will pay in adages. Box 3.

Public Service Announcement

August 7th is National Marry Someone in a Field Day. So don't forget to do that. Unless you are already married. Because it is NOT National Bigamy Day (that is in April which partially explains that month's reputation for cruelty).

Listen to Part Seventeen of

The Mystery of the Lost Lenore

Click on the picture. (4:06)

Or start from the beginning.




Here At Persiflage

A lot of people (7) have, over the years, expressed an interest in the daily conduct of business here at Persiflage. I guess reading the site each week has piqued their curiosity about how this whole thing is put together. This week I decided, what the hell, I would put together a little description of the office and our process here. I hope this satisfies some of your (yes, I mean you) prurient interest in our lives.

Monday 9AM Art Department meeting: this is when we decide on all the backgrounds and images that appear on the site. Most of these are hand painted by the many BFA students we have working in the basement here so this must be decided early in the week.

10:15 AM (approximately) Editorial Board meeting: usually me, Watermuldar and Kind, sometimes Hugo if he is not too busy going over copy.

11 AM Meet with news interns to see if they have found anything interesting in one of the over 200 local, national or international papers that PERSIFLAGE subscribes to, that warrants comment or even a feature article.

11:30 AM Writers' Meeting - a one on one meeting with that week's featured writer. Usually involves some screaming and sometimes violence.

NOON Lunch.

2 PM Nap. I find a heavy lunch (is there any other kind?) leaves me sleepy.

3 PM Teleconference with C.F. Maynard and his team of sound engineers to discuss the week's audio segment. Very technical. I usually drink a latte to stay awake.

4 PM Happy Hour. If I am still here I mix myself a Rum Collins or Manhattan in my office. Watermuldar is usually here sitting at the bar. Often we listen to some Xavier Cugat on the Hi-Fi.

5 or 6 PM Homeward bound.

Tuesday 9AM Sorting through my mail (e and non-e) with my secretary Donald. Then, often a little dictation if I am feeling dictatorial (ha ha).

10 AM Meeting with accountants and Head of the Finance Department, also called Donald. Much talk about diversifying our portfolio (whatever that means). Why does Persiflage have soybean futures?

10:30 AM Coffee with Gore Vidal.

10:45 AM Meeting with designer to look at swatches for the new banquettes in the cafeteria.

NOON Chamber of Commerce lunch.

3 PM Napping in office (too many Manhattans at lunch).

3:30 PM Second Art Department meeting to approve main and column backgrounds. Classified column needed to be repainted.

4 PM Happy Hour. Listened to a lot of Tito Puente and some Machito. Drank mojitos just to be thematically correct. Used my new muddler.

4:45 PM Homeward bound. Got a ride with Donald (the mailroom guy).

Wednesday 9AM Classifieds Meeting - Cindy and Marjolene, the girls who handle the classifieds, showed up with a tin of fresh Night Cookies, bonushausen!

10:30 AM coffee break - spent on phone with Gore Vidal - long distance.

11:15 AM Layout meeting with design team.

11:25 AM IT meeting re: the installation of a bank of powerful new card-reading (they're back!) super-computers in the Main Computer Room in the Annex. Also discussed: off-colour or "naughty" mouse pads.

1 PM Late lunch with U Thant's grandson. Interesting.

2:30 PM Impromptu thumb wrestling with Watermuldar. Building the tiny ring took up a lot of the time.

3 PM Watched part of an Antonio Sabato Jr. movie on television. Very underrated actor.

4 PM Happy Hour. Invented a new drink. Very hush hush.

6 PM Dinner with Gore Vidal. When did the Old Swiss Inn start serving Thai food?

9:30 PM Homeward bound. The bus.

10 PM Bubble bath (cucumber and kiwi).

11 PM Cup of Postum and several online games of tic tac toe.

11:59 PM Start writing this.

Hugh Briss

The Girl

He had seen her in the mall and he thought she probably worked there. It was winter and she wasn't wearing a coat.

Mind you they have those lockers. She could have put her coat in a locker while she shopped. He thought you only needed a loonie to do that and he was pretty sure you got that back. She could easily have done that.

That made him more interested. She was the kind of girl who planned ahead. She was the kind of girl who carried change.

That would come in handy if they went somewhere downtown in his car. If they went out to dinner or to a movie. She would have change for the parking meter.

"Do you have change for the meter, sweetie?" he would say, smiling at her.

"Sure, honey" she would reply, reaching into her purse (he thought she probably carried a purse. "I always carry change."

Boy, that would be nice.

He wondered if she worked at the mall.

M. Issing