Once again, for the amusement and edification of our sane readers (if there are any), we tear open our mailbag and let the nuts fall out.

Dear Persiflage,
I am a smallish neuron currently residing inside the brain of a VERY well-known actress. Modesty forbids me to reveal to you the name of that actress but I will say that she is QUITE the little thinker! Recently I was bumping around with some other neurons and we decided that relish is the only green condiment. Have any of your readers had similar epiphanies about condiments, or green things?
Petra Cranium

Dear Ms Cranium,
Surprisingly we get little mail on the subject of condiments. We would, however, welcome any interesting anecdotes our readers wish to share about them. Or green things for that matter.

Dear Persiflage,
I have long wondered where your ideas come from. Most of mine come from Idaho although I have been known to accept ideas from the Lesser Antilles and also Oaxaca (which I like to prounounce "Ohio"). But then that's me.
Goar Vidal (no relation to Gore Vidal)

Dear GV,
We make all our own ideas here in Winnipeg. Because of our commitment to the environment we like to follow the 100 mile rule which states that all ideas should originate within 100 miles of Gary Doer's house.

The Return of Ford Johnson


Male Novelist

It was cold. He liked the cold. It kept the pencilnecks off the street.
Wednesday. Wednesday afternoon.
He was drunk.
He spit on the sidewalk. It froze. On his chin. He chipped a bit off.
Nobody around. Cars went by. No bus. He tottered a bit. Just a bit. Not swaying.
He squinted up at the sun. Bright.
Still no bus.
He looked down at his hand. It was red. He couldn't bend his fingers. Did he do that last night? No. It was frozen.
Stupid hand.

Art Stuff

Don't forget the opening of Subconscious City at the Winnipeg Art Gallery February 14th. This new show features a veritable potpourri (pronounced Poe Purr EEE) of Winnipeg artists. Also I heard it was partially sponsored by Imperial Tobacco so there might be free smokes!

February 14, 2008

It takes a lot of effort to keep your head from getting wet when you swim, so that in itself is probably very good exercise.

Deborah Eisenberg

is updated on Thursdays.


For Sale: absolutely nothing. $4OBO Box 11.
For rent: a picture of me on a bicycle. Not riding it but sort of lying across it as it rests kind of flat on the ground. $.50/day Box 4789.
Will trade a 2007 calendar for a plastic collander, any year. Box 55.
For sale: small tin of communism. Pre-dates fall of Berlin Wall. $100. Box 1917.



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