I would start preparing myself now if I were you because here comes...


                                        for January the One-Oneth, Two Thousand and Seven

It is remarkable that the genitals themselves, the sight of which is always exciting, are hardly ever regarded as beautiful.
                                                                                  -Sigmund Freud

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For Sale: 1 pear. I can't tell if it's ripe or not. It still seems a bit green but I think it's softer than it was yesterday. Take a chance! $.50 OBO. Box 333.  ***   Wanted: personal qualities of forgiveness and tolerance. Will trade for extreme crankiness and and a rather worn pair of electric blue cycling shorts. Seat more or less intact. Box 449.  ***   I am travelling to the Bahamas this winter and I need someone to pay for my ticket and hotel room, and provide a little spending money, and also to water my plants (one hydro-electric power, and one cardboard box making) while I am away. I am leaving mid-February so please act quickly. Box 19.  ***  For Sale: computer anti-virus program. Includes bar of soap, small towel and a sort of vitamin creme that can be rubbed right onto the keyboard. $11. Box 22.

Tips for Winter Living

#13- When you check the Weather Channel pretend you live in Riyadh. It's warm there!


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