PERSIFLAGE

January 29th, 2009

Just because he's crazy doesn't mean he's wrong.

Anonymous

PERSIFLAGE
is updated on Thursdays.

Classifieds

For sale: sled that used to belong to Charles Foster Kane. Slightly burned. $400 OBO. Box 193.
Will trade my collection of priceless Who's The Boss Themed snowglobes for a date with any borderline acceptable girl type person. Box 90210.
For rent: wonderful ski chalet. Located on the Number 16 bus (Selkirk/Osborne). $2.30/day or $72.80/month. Contact Tom @ Unit B 414 Osborne Street for details.

Tips For Winter Living

Number Nine: Winter is theoretically a time for renewal: physical, emotional, intellectual. Try to enjoy it on that level. Or at least renew your library books.

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Why not send us an email?
persiflagemag@hotmail.com

Interesting Winter Facts

1. There were no winters anywhere until 73 BCE when they were invented the Ordovices, a group of Celts living in what is now Wales. It is not recorded why they did this.

2. Eating snow will not significantly lower your body temperature if you do it while sitting in a sauna.

3. The song The First No-el actually refers to the spelling of Noel itself which used to be spelled Noe.

4. Snow is not frozen water. Frozen water is ice. Snow is something else entirely and quite frankly I don't wish to discuss it anymore.*

5. Canada is known for its long winters.

6. Skating was allegedly begun four thousand (give or take) years ago in Finland, apparently in order to save energy. Fat lot of good it did.

7. The Parka was introduced into Western culture by the Inuit who found the many layers of Hawaiian shirts worn by white folks visiting the North kind of off-putting.

8. 111% of your body heat is lost through... no, not the top of your head, but through a three square inch (or in metric 1.7 square kilometres, or 3 cubic zirconia) area at the back of the head just below the crown (assuming you wear one).

9. Toboggan was originally a Lnuísimk (or Mi'kmaq) word meaning "very sore ass".

9a. Although the days seem shorter during the winter months (where I live - October through May) they are, in fact, the same length (24 hours) it's just that parts of them are darker.

10. Cold November rain is not an acceptable measure of eternity in Canada.

12ish. The coldest place on Earth is actually anyplace where you have no friends - aaaaawwww!

Did that last one warm your heart?

*C(harles) P(ercy) Snow. Baron Snow of Leicester. 1905-1980. British writer and scientist who is known especially for his 11-volume series Strangers and Brothers.

Winter Observed

emptiness, the void

The snow crisp

(it looks -

from out my window).

nothing here

The air cold

(the weather

channel says).

even less here

My skin

would freeze

(I'm told).

just another space

Spring

so far

away (according to

the calendar).

F. Gordon Shinks

Additional Content

Not sure what we should put in here. Probably something semi-topical i.e. winterish. And maybe jam a jpeg of something in as well. Depending on the space. Something like this one. BUT NOT THIS ONE! We've run this damn dog picture too many times. I know Briss likes it but frankly I'm good and sick of it. Make sure to check with Briss before running anything though. I don't want to hear about it later. And for God's sake don't run this. MAKE SURE you have content for this section BEFORE uploading the files to the web. You'll make us look like idiots! Stick Briss's siggie at the end whatever you end up putting here. EW

Hugh Briss