PERSIFLAGE

March 22nd, 2007

Spring is like a perhaps hand (which comes carefully out of Nowhere) arranging a window into which people look.
                             - e.e.cummings

PERSIFLAGE is "updated" on Thursdays except for those times when it isn't.

Classifieds

For Sale: one set of mukluks. Good for anyone foolish enough to spend another winter in this frozen burgh. Not me suckers! I'm moving south to Morris, ha ha! $35 Box 409.
Wanted: people willing to come up to my studio and look at my etchings. And I really mean LOOK. Box 32.
For sale: one Easter egg dying kit. Contains one set of tongs, 1 very small dipping vat, three jars of dye (yellow, blue and red) and the instructional handbook "Dyeing is Easy: How to Dye Easter Eggs" and an apron with a picture of a bunny on it. Also a bacon-dyeing kit. Box 19.

Why aren't you emailing us to tell us how great we are?

persiflagemag@hotmail.com

Mr Backyard Welcomes Spring

          PERSIFLAGE's Nature Correspondent gives the verdant season a warm welcome.

Spring has begun again and just like last year it has arrived in time for the vernal equinox. The vernal equinox is, for those of you who don't know, a term taken from Latin which means "equally harmful". Why is it applied to this time of year? It is because the weather now can be cold enough to freeze you or hot enough to cause heat stroke.

That's the thing about spring – it's wonderfully variant. One is provided with the chance to wear every single piece of clothing one owns within a twenty-four hour period.

Spring, although few people know it, is the most popular time to commit suicide. A lot of people think it's winter but it isn't. It's spring. A recent study conducted by the University of Göteborg's Institute of Suicideology uncovered that the reason most suicides give for killing themselves in the spring is that they are sick of not knowing what to wear. What you or I see as a serendipitous opportunity for wardrobe exploration and creativity, these poor losers see as an onerous burden (if that's not too overly redundant). How sad this is.

Mother Nature, in her infinite wisdom, provides us with many opportunities for joy with her marvelous bounty of environmental treats but sadly she has not provided all of us with wisdom enough to recognise them as such. Some of us unfortunately see difficulty in place of opportunity. There are even people who do not enjoy a winter wind's bracing chill or the cleansing cool provided by freezing rain. Well take heart all, the almost universally appreciated warm pleasures of the true spring are just around the corner.

Mr Backyard

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