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the funniest Marx brother

All I know is that I am not a Marxist.

Friedrich Engels
(quoting Marx)

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There will be no exploitation of the workers by the capitalist system in this space this week. But check back next week!




Little Known Facts From the Struggle Gleaned From the Internet

Few people know that the celebrated children's author, Alexander Berkman, once attacked his good friend, the philanthropist coke dealer Hank Frick.

Apparently both men were a little hot tempered and a minor disagreement about an onion escalated to the point where Berkman shot Frick three times and then apparently stabbed him with a nail file.

For several years afterward the men didn't speak to one another. Berkman though, after a trip to Russia, came to his senses and apologized. The two later spent a lot of time together fishing in the man-made lake near Johnstown, Pennsylvannia.

Let that be a message for the kids!

The Internet History Guy

On Thursday, May 8 at 7:00 p.m. at the Winnipeg Film Group's Studio (304-100 Arthur Street), Video Pool will present two live, spoken-word performances by Jeanne Randolph and Glen Johnson, one of whom is known for her creative, intelligent, and irreverent lectures (the other of which is, well, part of the deal). Randolph and Johnson will each address the myriad, ubiquitous, and often troubling ways technologies operate through contemporary art and everyday life.

Ronny Buber, Patriot

Ronny Buber hadn't lived in his apartment very long before he became aware of his neighbours. They seemed to be running a table saw every evening. At least, as Ronny sat in his red leather chair in his smoking jacket enjoying his after dinner pipe, he heard, without fail every evening, a sound that sounded very much like a table saw coming from the apartment next door. There was a good reason for this. Ronny Buber's next door neighbours were, every evening between dinner and bedtime, running a table saw in their apartment.

Mr. and Mrs. Pitnik were not only marmosets but they were accomplished cabinet makers. The spent their evenings making some of the finest cabinetry ever constructed by marmosets. They only worked in the evenings as they both had regular day jobs at a local insurance broker's. At the time Ronny Buber was living next door to them they were working on a very special and very secret project.

You see the Pitniks, besides being accomplished cabinet makers and very fine claims adjustors were also agents of the Soviet government. This was during the early eighties and the cold war was still going on.

The Pitniks had been specially tasked by Leonid Brezhnev himself with the job of constructing the very first all wooden marmoset-operated spy plane. There had been other wooden spy planes before but none of them were capable of being operated by a marmoset and Brezhnev felt that this left a serious gap in Soviet Defence Technology that could be exploited by the West.

So when Ronny Buber was relaxing in his apartment at night the sound he was hearing was the sound of the International Communist Conspiracy getting stronger. Ronny didn't know this, of course, but he found the noise irritating nonetheless. And that is why he called the police. And that is how they came to discover the massive Communist conspiracy and that is how the Pitniks came to be exchanged late one night at a Berlin checkpoint for a stoat named Miles Babych who had been building a radio transmitter in Vladivostok made entirely out of peanut brittle.