the sound and the furry   

November 6th, 2008

This is a free country. Folks have a right to send me letters, and I have a right not to read them.

William Faulkner

PERSIFLAGE is updated on Thursdays.


For Sale: something I daren't mention. Box 1.
For Rent: nice set of bulldog clips. In one he is fetching a stick and in the other he is lying down and licking himself. On DVD. $4/day. Box 22.
Will Trade: my priceless collection of antique hotel soaps for any correspondence between a snapping turtle named Alphonse and the late Princess Louise. If any exists. Box 3908.

Tall fellow with a love of bananas and stacked dishes seeks shorter fellow or fellows who like stacking things under direct supervision. Box 209.
Winsome girl with flaxen tresses seeks gay blade with roguish charm. Box 33.



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Audio Stories

Occasionally or from time to time or however you want to say it, one tires of using one's eyes and wants to really on one's ears to enjoy things such as stories. This, is a perfectly natural thing and nothing to be frightened of or worried about. In order to better serve those of you who are currently feeling this way we present hear a small selection of audio stories as read by the inimitable Uncle Glennie. We hope you enjoy them but if you don't... well hard cheese.

use this

Labour Troubles


The Meeting of the Board


Trouble Isn't My Business


The Girl Who Could See the Wind


Martin Issing


The Very Small Cats of Saint Villeneuve

If you drive almost straight south from Montreal on Highway sometime before you arrive at the border with New York, you will pass a gravel road which leads, by a rather meandering route to the hamlet of Saint Villeneuve.

Saint V. has a tiny church, a small general store, a few pretty and well-kept little houses and the smallest cats to be found in North America.

The mayor, M.Louis Parent, who has lived in Saint Villeneuve all of his life and whose parents were also born there, cannot remember a time when the cats were not there. They have simply always been a part of the life of the town.

The cats reside in a shoebox which is kept on a shelf in the curate's office in the tiny church. At the time I was in Saint Villenueve there were eleven cats and the largest was only the size of my thumb. The cats have never been much of a tourist attraction as they do not do anything particularily interesting. Just like regular sized cats they sleep and eat and clean themselves and that is about it. Once you have seen them and been impressed by their size or lack thereof there is nothing else to do but get back in your car and drive away. But that may soon change.

The eldest of the cats, Maurice, who went to business school, has decided that the cats are an underexploited commodity. It is Maurice's plan to create a sort of amusement park on the outskirts of town.

The park, to be called Parc du Fun par Maurice et Les Autres Petits Chats, will feature tiny cat themed rides, tiny cat merchandise and tiny cat magazines and books in the giftshop.

Maurice believes that the Parc will be a huge draw for tourists and a big moneymaker not only for him and his brethren but for the town. M. LaFrenais, the proprietor of the local depanneur disagrees.

M. LaFrenais, an extremely tall man who is left-handed, believes that the amusement park is an idea doomed to failure. Although his business stands to gain greatly from any increased traffic in the town, the store owner is against the project. When asked why LaFrenais merely shrugged saying "Maurice est fou. Les petits chats de leur déchets d'argent!"

Others in the village are in favour of Maurice's plans believing them to be financially sound and good for the town. Opinions amongst the human citizens of Saint Villeneuve seem to be split fairly evenly but the tiny cats appear to be wholly behind Maurice. It will be interesting to see what happens.

Sally Kind